Horrible, horrible purchases

Everybody makes horrible, horrible decisions sometimes. Particularly regarding purchasing certain items. The real question here is, are these horrible decisions mistakes, or are they intentional? Because sometimes, you can't help but make a terrible purchase, because of the hilarity of it.

I did this myself the other day, but let's back up a little bit to the beginning of this story, shall we?

The story begins on Saturday Morning. I had stayed home that Friday night, due to needing to be in my home electorate for the state election - I needed to be able to vote. Hence, my girlfriend and I decided it would be best for me to go home on Friday, instead of the usual ritual of heading to her place then for the weekend. That way, I could vote on Saturday, then head on over to her place where we do... well, whatever we feel like for the weekend (this weekend we watched Higurashi No Naku Koro Ni)!

Oh yeah, it's cute until they start mercilessly slaughtering each other

So, after staying up to 2am playing Dragon Age (what can I say? It had me hooked!), I went to bed, only to be woken up at around 8.40 by my mother. "Wake up, we need to go and vote!"

I was allowed to return to bed, since I was going to walk down to the local school and do that on my own later, but the awakeness and noise from the rest of the house convinced me that trying to sleep was a horrendous idea, so I got up, showered, and proceeded to vote. Afterwards, I packed my things, got a train and a boat to Manly, and met up with Sarah.

We decided it would be a good idea to go to the mall, since neither of us had eaten anything that day, so food was high on the agenda, and she was interested in getting a second controller for her somewhat-newly-acquired PS3. We entered EBGames before grabbing our food.

And that is where I saw the sale. In typical EB fashion, there was a "3 preowned games for $50" deal going on, and I always make a point of looking at those, since you can occasionally find hidden gems.

I managed to find Resistance: Fall of Man - a game I had been looking for cheaply for a while, mainly because I'd bought the sequel cheap, but being OCD when it comes to games, refused to play it until I had found and conquered the prior game (This burning need tends to get relaxed in certain situations, like Final Fantasy, where the games have nothing to do with each other, or in Metal Gear, where the original couple are inaccessible to me).

I desperately began to look for two other games of note, to justify the purchase. I managed to find a game called "Eat Lead - The Return of Matt Hazard", a game which, by all accounts, sucks. Except that it parodies other games. And has a character voiced by Neil Patrick Harris. OHMYGODAWESOME.

Everyone's favourite suited-up womaniser

Satisfied by that decision, I began to look for a third game. Something to round out the $50 deal. It didn't have to be amazing, it had to be bearable, to make it worth picking up the other two. I almost bought Blacksite with it (rounding out three generic shooters - two of them featuring aliens), but then, I saw it. What has to be the worst game ever.

Can you pick what is it? I'll give you a hint - its real value is likely to be about 50 cents.

Have a minute thinking time.

OK, time's up.

50 Cent - Blood on the Sand. I bought a game about a rapper, who fights terrorists (apparently). The plot is so awful that I needed to purchase this game. The following is quoted from the source of all knowledge, Wikipedia.

"The game is set in an urban warzone in an unnamed Middle Eastern country, where 50 Cent and G-Unit have been hired to play a rap concert. After the concert the promoter refuses to pay them the US $10-million in cash he promised, but relents after being threatened. However, instead of the cash they were promised, he gives them a diamond-and-pearl encrusted human skull as collateral. This is promptly stolen by a paramilitary group. 50 Cent (with the help of a selected G-Unit partner) decides to get it back at any cost."

So there we have it - a purchase that is so bad, it's amazing. Once I'm finished with Dragon Age (another day or two), I will play this to take a break before I head onto FF13, or Dragon Age 2. I just don't expect I shall be sane by the end of it.

I will probably look something like this

So, I put it to you, loyal readers (all three of you). What horrible things have you purchased intentionally. I don't mean buying something that you thought would be awesome, but it turned out to be the most horrible thing you've ever experienced (Assassin's Creed, anyone?). I mean things you know are a bad idea, but you bought it anyway. Either BECAUSE it was a bad idea, or because you wanted to torture yourself. Let me know in the comments!

I will have no fingers by the age of 30

I want Rock Band 3. However, I will likely not get the version of Rock Band 3 that I want. If I do, then I will destroy my fingers playing it!

Today, after completing my Christmas shopping with my girlfriend, I stopped off at the local EBGames store, having heard that they "exclusively" stocked the Rock Band 3 pro instruments. These instruments are utterly insane - a drumkit with a couple of extra pads (meh), a keyboard/keytar (cool), and a pro guitar, with approximately 140 buttons, and the ability to be plugged into a MIDI converter and be used as an actual freakin' guitar!

I want this guitar.

So I stopped off at EB, dodged the people who were asking what the difference was between Starcraft and Warcraft (Really? Can't you people read the box like a creature with some sort of intellect instead of wasting the serving peoples' time like some kind of zombie?). When I finally got to ask the attendant, she asked me if that was the "fancy controller". After I nod, she proceeds to inform me that they were on "special order" only.

I ask to put in one of these so called "special orders". She said that they don't do it any more.

Um... why tell me it was special order only if you don't actually do it anymore? This seems rather redundant, but whatever. So EBGames has failed me yet again. Remembering that I had seen a GamesMen brochure advertising the controller in question, I made a mad dash over to Hurstville on the way home to try and acquire it.

Due to getting lost on the way (I rarely drive around the Northern beaches, it's completely foreign to me), and then being caught behind an accident on the main road back (seriously, don't people know how to drive anymore?), I found the shop... closed.

Upon reaching home, I did some research. Turns out the shop closed at 4pm (so I would have NEVER made it, leaving the Northern Beaches at around 3.30pm). So I turned to the typical online shopping options.

PlayAsia has none in stock. The GamesMen has the controller on its own for $250. That's a LOT of money just for a controller. Even if it doubles as an actual guitar. Which it does.

Ebay has about the same prices. Amazon has it for $150 US. Considering the current state of the Aussie dollar compared to the US one, I figured that's the way to go.

Except that Amazon are being racist and not actually shipping these controller to Australia, for some inexplicable reason. I would be perfectly fine to pay extra shipping charges due to it being a large item, and that was the only real caveat I could find about shipping to Australia.

So my options appear to be to spend half a week's pay on a game and the corresponding epic controller for it (which, to be completely honest, I find a little difficult to justify right now), not bother and hope somebody reads this and gets me it for Christmas (highly doubtful, since the people who would spend such ludicrous amounts of money on me have already finished their Christmas shopping), or give up entirely.

It appears I am unlikely to be able to destroy my fingers and self-esteem on a pro-guitar after all.